In This Moment… Leaving Las Vegas
Here’s my morning writing from Vegas this past Friday. I did a full and final pack-up of the house and watched the movers load the truck with the rest of our things that are headed to Portland next week. It looks like we’re closing soon on the house!
In this moment…
Jasmine. This perfumed air. Remembering the potent fragrance when I arrived late Wednesday. Jasmine-soaked air even at night. Jasmine air. So strong on the patio, one last morning. The sprinklers water my overgrown lawn – soon to be someone else’s lawn – always the rabbit’s lawn. And these birds – everywhere! I don’t remember so many birds and varieties, so many landing on this one branch out in front of me – landing, then going, stopping and starting. Yesterday evening, before visiting L in the hospital, I watched the birds coming and going, and I could have – wanted to -- stay for hours. Used to sit here for hours – my favorite room in the house, this patio. Remembering all the moments – sitting, watching, listening, writing -- napping, eating, gathering, talking. The occasional writing circle. Remember how magical those felt, you women who were here?! Tears. Remembering the crescent moon and cool air last night, sharing a glass of wine with Dawn, a last gathering on this patio, and I remember Dawn, looking at you with such admiration and adoration for who you are, as you spoke about the internship you and Keith set up for the STEM kids. You lit up! Thank you for picking me up from the hospital and sharing that hour together, here. It was closure I didn’t realize I needed. But sitting in a puddle of tears, hand shaking as I write, I see I do… Goodbye Las Vegas. Thank you.
Whoa. I hadn’t expected the depth of emotion that washed over me as I wrote those handful of sentences.
For sure, moving can be emotional -- like the night I arrived, in the wee-hours of the morning, I took down the 24 black-and-white framed photos of Connor and Maddie as babies and toddlers that lived on my office wall. It was a big job to carefully remove each photo from its frame and place it in its new home -- a single box. I felt tender thinking about how big my kids are now, and the many sweet memories raising them in that home of 15 years.
But that morning-writing shook me unexpectedly and hi-lighted what I cherish most: connecting to myself through writing and simply sitting in stillness and natur, and connecting with family, friends, fellow free-flow writers...
With love and gratitude,
* * *
P.S. L in the piece is Leonard, my father-in-law, and he was hospitalized for pneumonia for a few days. He came home the day I finished with the movers and I got to stay with him and my mother-in-law, Ginnie, for 2 nights. I’ll never forget how much fun Ginnie and I had watching the royal wedding and just hanging out while L rested upstairs.
P.P.S. I’ve received several inquiries about my family. Here’s an update:
- Since leaving Portland this winter, Connor has been living with Kep’s brother and family in southern CA. I’m with them now, hanging out and touring the high school he’s attending in the fall, which we're all thrilled about. Though it’s always a challenge for an athlete to be between teams, there’s a twinkle in his eyes as he hones in on his next soccer home, and it’s fun to see him in his new home home with his cousins, aunt, and uncle.
- As of a few months ago, Kep has officially moved his business from Vegas to Portland and is here full-time. Yay!!
- Maddie said to me a few weeks ago that she’s “thriving” (which made my heart sing!) This spring break, she stayed back from visiting my dad in Florida to attend a week-long training with Youth Line and now answers calls each week from distressed teens. She’s quite good at it – and she’s psyched for her Memorial Day weekend visit with Connor and the CA Sweeney’s.
Thank you, everyone, for your inquiries and for spending time with me in this space.
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